5 Things I Learned Attending a 10 Day Silent Meditation Retreat

Not talking for 10 days is f***ing hard — but it was worth it. Here’s why.

Instead of spending my last semester at UofM taking classes, I decided to graduate early and spend 3 months traveling solo in Southeast Asia. During my trip I attended a ten day silent meditation retreat at Wat Suan Mokkh in Southern Thailand. I was recommended to attend and was additionally encouraged when I saw it on a list of the top ten best meditation centers in the world. You can find out more information about Suan Mokkh’s programs here.

The experience was life changing, empowering and helped to instill a confidence in my resilience, determination and mental stamina. It exceeded every expectation I had.

I believe everyone has the ability to complete and grow from a ten day retreat. Here are 5 takeaways I had during my time at Wat Suan Mokkh. My hope by posting this is that it will encourage at least one person to further explore meditation at a ten day silent retreat. If you ever have the opportunity to attend one — grab it!

Suan Mokkh grounds — it was one of the most beautiful and peaceful places I have ever been

1) Meditation becomes more valuable and less daunting

Meditation is to have intention and awareness of your thoughts and actions. You don’t meditate to get anything, but to get rid of things. We do it, not with desire but with letting go. If you “want” anything, you will not find it.

Over the course of my ten days at Wat Suann Mokkh, I meditated for about 90 hours. This included standing, walking and sitting meditations. Most days the meditation would be continuous for 2–3 hours. I struggled with staying focused on my meditation and breathing. I realized that by attending the retreat, I had proved to myself that I had the stamina to actively meditate for a long time. Suddenly, the idea of meditating for 10 to 20 minutes a day seemed not only doable but appealing. I had the tools to make it a daily habit to improve my life.The retreat helped foster a paradigm shift that meditation was extremely valuable and manageable, instead of being a chore.

2) Eating becomes a more joyful and mindful activity

SILENT = LISTEN : NOW HERE = NOWHERE : HEART = EARTH

During the retreat, the stimulation of daily life is taken away. There is no technology, reading material, organized activities or talking. Suddenly the mundane pleasures of an average day (i.e. eating twice a day) become glorious. Each meal is an exciting time and every bite becomes an action to savor. I remember eating a piece of pineapple that was the most vibrant yellow. One bite and my taste buds exploded into a cacophony of overlapping juice and flavors. It was so memorable because of my intense concentration on the eating experience.

The *silent* mess hall

In daily Western life, food is devoured with attention constantly shifting from friends and phone back to your meal. At a mediation retreat an intense concentration is formed around the act of eating. I took this practice away with me after the retreat and have found myself better able to appreciate and focus on my meals and eat them more slowly.

3) Learn how to properly sit

We are impermanent, therefore we can change. Letting go of the self means being able to change.

Of the 9–10 hours of active meditation that is scheduled per day, about 7 of it is sitting meditations. Two positions are allowed: cross legged on the floor and on a small wooden block about half a foot tall — there are no couches or bean bags. If you do not learn how to sit properly and manage inevitable back pain frustration, an early exit is in order. Before the retreat I could not sit cross legged. By the end I could sit cross legged for up to 30 minutes and I have maintained that increased flexibility to this day. Learning to properly sit also helped my meditation — it prevented loss of balance while seated and helped align all seven chakras.

4) Completion of a retreat instills confidence in future endeavors

Life is not like a boat in an ocean. Actually, we are the ocean and the problems are the boat. Trying to run away from suffering is actually to run toward it.

Lets be real — most people do not have the interest, stamina or motivation to attend a ten day retreat. The schedule alone is daunting, not to mention all the challenges that become apparent by living it for ten days — lack of stimulation, lack of sleep, back pain, boredom, hunger, frustration and staring your own subconscious in the face. The sense of accomplishment that ballooned in my system at the end was astounding. I can firmly say that it is one of my greatest accomplishments. The retreat instilled a deep sense of patience and trust in my own ability to complete a challenge. It forced me to dig deep into my own willpower and push myself to face the external challenges and the internal mental bludgeoning that is inevitable over ten days in your own subconscious.

5) Find joy and mental balance

Train the mind to understand wisdom instead of ignorance. Know the outer world but do not depend on it.

As I continued to delve further into my subconscious during the retreat, I came to the realization that my thoughts continuously returned to the same few themes, and stories. Supan —the teacher of the retreat — explained to us that meditation was not about seeking happiness but finding an evenness and inherent joy to life. Instead of intense days of happiness and sadness, meditation helps find an evenness between the two. Supan emphasized that life is inherently joyous. The breath is life and life is wonderful.

Me with Master Supan after the ten day retreat — I lost 6 pounds during the retreat

I realized that I overvalued a few things in my life and that my success in those areas were too closely tied to my happiness. By meditating on these incessant thoughts, I began the slow and arduous process of ‘balancing’ my life so that a few aspects of my life could not overwhelm my happiness or sadness at any given time.

There are many more benefits that I did not list including an increased sense of patience, healthier sleep habits, appreciation of nature, increased understanding of addiction and more. Keep an eye out for other post about my experiences at Wat Suan Mokkh, hiking the Annapurna circuit and other adventures. Cheers!